Funeral is this weekend, I'm sure the diet will go to shit.

I started this "diet" thing almost 4 months ago (4 months on the 17th). I think I have done pretty good. Typically you should lose 2lbs a week, so in 4 months there are 16 weeks so 32lbs would be what the experts call "healthy". SO I lost 35lbs as of today so I guess I am right on track. It is just nice to feel healthy. I have never been a girl who had self esteem problems. I always knew what I lacked in a tight body I made up for with my sparkling personality, lol. I never thought I was ugly, or fat...and I still don't think I was. But feeling healthy is like a whole new level, I like the feeling of wanting to do something athletic. I want to try wake boarding in the summer. I want to do all these things that I would have thought I was too heavy to do. It is just nice to feel good....just good.

Lately I modified my diet. I am still sticking with my 1200 to 1500 calories a day diet, but I am also being very diligent about my carbs and fat. I decided I want 2/3 of my carbs to come from fruit and vegetables and the other 1/3 from whole grains. I don't know if that fits into the Canada's Food Guide standard, lol, but it is working for me. So I have a smoothie every morning with strawberries, banana, soy milk and yogurt. It is an easy way to get something in me in the morning since I know it is essential to eat in the morning. I am trying to have a big breakfast, and a medium lunch and dinner. It seems to be working.

One random thing I decided is that I am going to try to master cleanse diet, lol. Sounds stupid I know, but I only want to try for a day. I just hear so much about it I want to see for myself. I guess I'm just one of those people who actually want to be able to talk about it because I did it and not because I heard about it. Plus if I want to talk bad about it I should at least know what exactly I'm talking bad about. SO I have to choose one day to do this silly master cleanse and that will be it. I am not a fan of starving myself.

Had an amazing Christmas with the family. Of course we are mental and all dressed up in velour. If you have facebook then you can go there and witness it for yourself. I got ton of great stuff: jacket, perfume, juicy bag, chanel wallet, shot glass, socks, cocktail book, jewelry and lots of awesome random stuff. It was a good day all together.

Ahh, so what am I up to these days, well nothing philosophical. Getting ready for Christmas, which is always exciting. I helped my mom decorate the house last week. We put up the trees, the village and the snowman collection. This is the first year in a while I got to decorate the trees, I usually come home and they are done. I even got to touch the classy tree, hahaha.
But right now I don't feel very good, and I'm not sure why. My stomach feels like it's trying to escape...I'm going to try my best not to let that happen.
Lots has been going on with my grandparents these days. My grandpa was admitted to the hospital in a semi-coma state, but he seems to be awake now. My grandma desperatly need to move out of the huge house they live in. So lots of drama for my parents to deal with a day after returning from Maui. But for now we seem to have convinced my grandma to move into a retirement home, and since being admitted to the hospital my grandpa can't be released unless he is going straight to a care facility. Which is the best thing, they are very stuck in there ways, and I'm glad someone is forcing this on them...it's the best solution for everyone. Unfortunatly it may be an eventful Christmas...crossed fingers that its not.
Other than all that stuff my life is lame...hahaha.
Sunday I am going to face the people and finish up my Christmas shopping, finally. Me and my sister got together and finished up the parents a while ago but I have been neglecting to finish Holly's stuff for a while.I hope there is a good glass palce in the mall, I want to get here some sort of glass statue. (lol, inside joke)

I just finished running and I am sweaty, hahaha attractive I know. But now I feel good, and I haven't even done my pilates yet.
I just feel so good these days, I have totally changed the way the way that I live my life. I look at food differently, and I look at myself differently. I still enjoy my food, and I do eat a ton of it. But I have learned how to eat lots of really good stuff instead of not a lot of junk.
I suppose the reason I ballooned (literally) to 200lbs was because I would eat something really bad for me (like a whole pizza) and that would be it for the day. Not to mention the 26er of vodka I was drinking every 3 days. Damn college life.
I have talked to some people who are concerned about always being hungry on a diet, but damn I have a hard time eating enough. What I do know if try to eat between 1200 and 1400 calories a day, but some days I eat dinner and realize I have only had 800 or 900 calories so far.
I am just so happy with the changes in myself, not just my body. Although not being 200lbs anymore isn't too shabby. I have always liked myself even when I was huge, but now I have a hot(ter) body to go along with it, lol.
So I started this change at 196lbs, but my heaviest was 206lbs. I weighed myself after lunch and I was 170lbs. I was 170lbs FULLY dressed and with a full stomach. I am hoping to be down to 165lbs by Christmas, and 150lbs by my birthday (03/15).
I have decided that as a present to myself I will get the tattoo I have wanted forever but was always too fat to get, lol.
If any of you feel like checking up on me, or looking at my wondering weight loss graph (hahaha I'm a nerd) go here...
http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=Siobhan22
and be impressed.

Wow.Has it been a time...lol. I sound like an old woman. But I got a job,and I quit the job. I decided to lose weight, and I am. It's crazy, lol.
Quickly because I'm not on my own computer...I got a job, the manager was a bitch and decided to blame me for everything so I quit.
I decided in Sept to lose weight and so far I have lost 24 pounds. I have decided that by my birthday if I am at my goal weight I will get the star tattoo that i have wanted for a while. We will see I suppose. I may get it even if I'm not at my goal.
Finally I have gotten in contact with some people from rangers and I am finally gonna get together with them. Yay. It has been too long, and I wish I hadn't let it go so long. I am going to try to write in here again, lol. I get distracted by life too easily.

So I am so stinking busy with work I don't write in this thing anymore. I guess I will give you a lowdown on what is going on with me.

I got a job at a Resort on the Rideau called the Monterey Inn and Resort. It is a very nice place, looks a lot like a ski chalet. The people are so nice, but I am finding myself annoyed by the lack of management experience. No one has any education and it seems to be a "fly by the seat of your pants" style, which really doesn't suit me. With structure I flourish, but with chaos I can lose myself. But it is a paycheck for now and I am looking around for something better. The problem is I don't speak French...and since I live in Ottawa...40 minutes from Quebec...it is essential to many of the jobs.

I am also looking for a place to live. So far I have found some super cute places around Ottawa. I found one place that is $719 a month and has a big walk in closet. I would kill for it...

On a personal front I have been on this diet/life style adjustment since September 17th and since then I have lost around 18 pounds. Which is pretty good since I am not really changing my exercise plan, I am really just eating better, but it seems to be working.

Other than that I don't have much going on. I'm not dating anyone because I don't care to. I am just too self centered for a boyfriend, plus guys are ridiculous.

So I suck lately at keeping this up... boo. But it's only going to get worse from here on out. As of Tuesday I start my 5am days, how exciting. I am not happy about it, but what can you do. It's the highest paying job I've found around here lately. The search will continue for a better job, an apartment and a car...but I will suck it up and wake up ungodly early for a while. It might not be as bad as I think it will be. Hell, I was used to getting up at 6am every morning for school, so what's one hour earlier....hahaha...and I get paid for this one, lol.

Imagine you are on your deathbed. Recommend to those who remain in your life...
1) One book to read. EDIE by Jean Stein
2) One movie to watch. American Psycho
3) One food to eat.Spanicopita
4) One place to go.The ocean
5) One life lesson to leave behind.Dance as if no one is watching

I feel like I should be keeping a running tally of my friends who are getting engaged. Seriously...when did getting engaged become the new pink? Everyone seems to be doing it...blah. Now I couldn't care less if you prefer to be in a relationship long term or prefer to date around a lot, or not at all, but I don't like the idea of people getting engaged randomly. People my age and YOUNGER and planning to get married. MARRIED. At 19 you want to marry him? How can you know at that age...I couldn't even commit to a fragrance at 19 and I still can't.

If you aren't mature enough to go to enough classes to pass college
YOU SHOULD NOT GET MARRIED
If you still talk like a valley girl cheerleader
YOU SHOULD NOT GET MARRIED
If you can't keep fresh milk in the fridge cause your too lazy to buy fresh stuff
YOU SHOULD NOT GET MARRIED
If the guy your with cheated on his girlfriend with you
YOU SHOULD NOT GET MARRIED

OK, the recent news...here I go.

Grad was a lot of fun. We drove up on the Thursday and went out for dinner and spent the night in an OK hotel. We got up early the next morning and it was hot as balls. So I get there extreamly early and get my gown and head to the gowning room. Of course the room I was in didn't have air conditioning...so I was sweating my ass off. Finally we got into the gym to listen to a bunch of old people who I had never met in my whole 4 years there talk about how they are proud of us. I don't know how they could be since they probably didn't know a single one of ours names combined. But the ceremony was good, only like 2.5 hours I believe. Ma got me a frame for my diploma and it actually looks really good. So all in all it was good to see everyone again. And today I got my grades...hahahah...I guess when I got my diploma I kind of assumed I had passed everything so I didn't care much about the actual grades.

Some other time I went out and got some more clothes...I didn't have much to go to an interview in so I got a red dress and some comfy cute shoes and some nicer looking shirts. Now I plan on actually starting to apply places. I don't care where although I would prefer somewhere not right downtown Ottawa. I hate the idea of driving an hour to work...I may try to find something stupid in town just to make some money for myself while I look for something better.

Presently I am watching Children of the Corn...and I just realized that I have a terrible sunburn from mowing the lawn today. The grass was incredibly long because of all the rain it had been like a week and a half since it had been mowed. Horrible. It was frusterating.

It's so funny how easy it is to buy pot in CP.
If I was in NB I would have a better chance of finding X or shrooms randomly on the street.
But here you go from needing pot and having 10 bucks to being stoned in about 20 minutes....impressive.

Ok: everyone ignore this post. I have to say it, but I'm sure no one wants to hear it...

( post for me )

ive been having some wicked solid kamakazi's today...must of been something i ate

no

Will eating too much pesto make your poop green?
Updates at 6:00.

remember when leaving your high-school friends was the hardest thing to do

Been home for a while, and it's been really nice. I have been helping my mom around the house and in the garden, and working on my tan. Well, actually I am working on a great burn, damn Scottish skin. But so far I have got three calls from hotels, I just have to call them back and set up a time to do an interview. All the hotels are right downtown, which is nice. That will be convenient when I move down there, lol. One is out in the Gatineau's...that one is kind of far away. Considering I will have to pay for gas to get to this job I don't think I will be taking the job out there. I still want to do the interview though, I haven't had much experience in interview situations (I've had 2 interviews my entire life) so I would enjoy doing a practice one, lol.
Hmm, what else is new? Well I finally scanned all my Ranger pictures and put them on Facebook...I have been meaning to do that for ages. I would like for us all to get together sometime this summer, especially now that Shannon is is Barrie.
So instead of going to bed I'm going to watch Freddy vs. Jason, moisturize my back, and creep on Facebook. Sounds like an plan, man I'm a loser.